the truth to my customers!

I work for Enterprise. *** I think you are ready for this now..enjoy

I have advanced degrees in Accounting, Public Relations, Marketing, Business,

Computer Science, Civil Engineering, Auto Propulsion, and Swahili.

Of course, I have the reservation that you booked six years ago even though you

don't have the confirmation number and you think that it was under a name that

starts with an "X".

It's not a problem for me to give you a 12 passenger, non-smoking, convertible

hatchback, sports car with six doors. All front row seating, and yes, I can

install a turbocharger. I know it is my fault that we don't have one with

purple leather seats.

I work for Enterprise. I am expected to speak all languages. It is obvious to

me that when you booked your reservation for Friday that you really meant

Saturday. My company has entrusted me with all financial information and

decisions and yes, I can tell you why your bill from March of 1987 contained a

$2.00 gas charge because obviously you never pay for gas charges.

I work for Enterprise. I understand that I am beneath you and anything you say

surely was passed down from The Almighty Himself. And I understand that you are

far too busy to stop for 2 seconds so I can print your receipt. And of course I

will fax it to you while you try to sputter your fax number as you jump onto

the shuttle. And if you give me the wrong number and don't get it right away, I

apologize, I should have know the number by heart.

I understand that McGulicutty's Widget Manufacturing is a vast empire that will

make or break our company. Yes, I am lying to you when I say we have no more

cars available. It is not a problem for me to quickly assemble several more

cars. This time I will not forget the purple leather seats.

I work for Enterprise. I am quite capable of checking three contracts in, two

contracts out, taking 5 reservations, answering fifteen incoming calls and

changing the oil in that blue Camry, all at the same time.

I always know where to find the best vegetarian-Kosher-Mongolian barbeque

restaurants. I know exactly what to see and do in this Denver in fifteen

minutes without spending any money. I take personal blame for airline food,

traffic jams, dirty hotel rooms and the National Economy. I understand that

your bad day or your accident, or broken down car are entirely my fault. I

realize that you meant to book your reservation here. People often confuse us

with the "Turkeylurkey Dogsled Rental of the Northern Artic Circle." Of course

I can "fit you in" and yes, you may have the special one dollar rate because you

are affiliated with the Hoboken Accounting and Bagel Club.

I am expected to smile, empathize, sypathize, console, upsell, downsell (and of

course, know when to do which), perform, sing, dance, and fix the printer.

I work for Enterprise.

and you know what......i actually like it, so anyone who has a problem with it, you know where the door is!


top performer

[Robert]

Originally Posted by the top performer

I work for Enterprise. *** I think you are ready for this now..enjoy

I have advanced degrees in Accounting, Public Relations, Marketing, Business,

Computer Science, Civil Engineering, Auto Propulsion, and Swahili.

Of course, I have the reservation that you booked six years ago even though you

don't have the confirmation number and you think that it was under a name that

starts with an "X".

It's not a problem for me to give you a 12 passenger, non-smoking, convertible

hatchback, sports car with six doors. All front row seating, and yes, I can

install a turbocharger. I know it is my fault that we don't have one with

purple leather seats.

I work for Enterprise. I am expected to speak all languages. It is obvious to

me that when you booked your reservation for Friday that you really meant

Saturday. My company has entrusted me with all financial information and

decisions and yes, I can tell you why your bill from March of 1987 contained a

$2.00 gas charge because obviously you never pay for gas charges.

I work for Enterprise. I understand that I am beneath you and anything you say

surely was passed down from The Almighty Himself. And I understand that you are

far too busy to stop for 2 seconds so I can print your receipt. And of course I

will fax it to you while you try to sputter your fax number as you jump onto

the shuttle. And if you give me the wrong number and don't get it right away, I

apologize, I should have know the number by heart.

I understand that McGulicutty's Widget Manufacturing is a vast empire that will

make or break our company. Yes, I am lying to you when I say we have no more

cars available. It is not a problem for me to quickly assemble several more

cars. This time I will not forget the purple leather seats.

I work for Enterprise. I am quite capable of checking three contracts in, two

contracts out, taking 5 reservations, answering fifteen incoming calls and

changing the oil in that blue Camry, all at the same time.

I always know where to find the best vegetarian-Kosher-Mongolian barbeque

restaurants. I know exactly what to see and do in this Denver in fifteen

minutes without spending any money. I take personal blame for airline food,

traffic jams, dirty hotel rooms and the National Economy. I understand that

your bad day or your accident, or broken down car are entirely my fault. I

realize that you meant to book your reservation here. People often confuse us

with the "Turkeylurkey Dogsled Rental of the Northern Artic Circle." Of course

I can "fit you in" and yes, you may have the special one dollar rate because you

are affiliated with the Hoboken Accounting and Bagel Club.

I am expected to smile, empathize, sypathize, console, upsell, downsell (and of

course, know when to do which), perform, sing, dance, and fix the printer.

I work for Enterprise.

and you know what......i actually like it, so anyone who has a problem with it, you know where the door is!


top performer

You should go into recruiting. And, get this posted on the Careers page.

Originally Posted by Robert

You should go into recruiting. And, get this posted on the Careers page.

It's a very well distributed script. We have them in Ontario. I'd say it paints a pretty accurate picture

[supplemental_liability]

You need to do standup at the company picnic next summer. Damn I bet you rip shit up after a few drinks.

[hekiliko'olau]

Originally Posted by the top performer

I work for Enterprise. *** I think you are ready for this now..enjoy

I have advanced degrees in Accounting, Public Relations, Marketing, Business,

Computer Science, Civil Engineering, Auto Propulsion, and Swahili.

Of course, I have the reservation that you booked six years ago even though you

don't have the confirmation number and you think that it was under a name that

starts with an "X".

It's not a problem for me to give you a 12 passenger, non-smoking, convertible

hatchback, sports car with six doors. All front row seating, and yes, I can

install a turbocharger. I know it is my fault that we don't have one with

purple leather seats.

I work for Enterprise. I am expected to speak all languages. It is obvious to

me that when you booked your reservation for Friday that you really meant

Saturday. My company has entrusted me with all financial information and

decisions and yes, I can tell you why your bill from March of 1987 contained a

$2.00 gas charge because obviously you never pay for gas charges.

I work for Enterprise. I understand that I am beneath you and anything you say

surely was passed down from The Almighty Himself. And I understand that you are

far too busy to stop for 2 seconds so I can print your receipt. And of course I

will fax it to you while you try to sputter your fax number as you jump onto

the shuttle. And if you give me the wrong number and don't get it right away, I

apologize, I should have know the number by heart.

I understand that McGulicutty's Widget Manufacturing is a vast empire that will

make or break our company. Yes, I am lying to you when I say we have no more

cars available. It is not a problem for me to quickly assemble several more

cars. This time I will not forget the purple leather seats.

I work for Enterprise. I am quite capable of checking three contracts in, two

contracts out, taking 5 reservations, answering fifteen incoming calls and

changing the oil in that blue Camry, all at the same time.

I always know where to find the best vegetarian-Kosher-Mongolian barbeque

restaurants. I know exactly what to see and do in this Denver in fifteen

minutes without spending any money. I take personal blame for airline food,

traffic jams, dirty hotel rooms and the National Economy. I understand that

your bad day or your accident, or broken down car are entirely my fault. I

realize that you meant to book your reservation here. People often confuse us

with the "Turkeylurkey Dogsled Rental of the Northern Artic Circle." Of course

I can "fit you in" and yes, you may have the special one dollar rate because you

are affiliated with the Hoboken Accounting and Bagel Club.

I am expected to smile, empathize, sypathize, console, upsell, downsell (and of

course, know when to do which), perform, sing, dance, and fix the printer.

I work for Enterprise.

and you know what......i actually like it, so anyone who has a problem with it, you know where the door is!


top performer

You definitely are a top performer! I would have loved to read this to a customer or two when I was with ERAC. YOU DA SHIT!

wow, I read this script 2 years ago when I was working at ERAC nice to know it is still going around :)

[glad2bgone]

Originally Posted by the top performer

I work for Enterprise. *** I think you are ready for this now..enjoy

I have advanced degrees in Accounting, Public Relations, Marketing, Business,

Computer Science, Civil Engineering, Auto Propulsion, and Swahili.

Of course, I have the reservation that you booked six years ago even though you

don't have the confirmation number and you think that it was under a name that

starts with an "X".

It's not a problem for me to give you a 12 passenger, non-smoking, convertible

hatchback, sports car with six doors. All front row seating, and yes, I can

install a turbocharger. I know it is my fault that we don't have one with

purple leather seats.

I work for Enterprise. I am expected to speak all languages. It is obvious to

me that when you booked your reservation for Friday that you really meant

Saturday. My company has entrusted me with all financial information and

decisions and yes, I can tell you why your bill from March of 1987 contained a

$2.00 gas charge because obviously you never pay for gas charges.

I work for Enterprise. I understand that I am beneath you and anything you say

surely was passed down from The Almighty Himself. And I understand that you are

far too busy to stop for 2 seconds so I can print your receipt. And of course I

will fax it to you while you try to sputter your fax number as you jump onto

the shuttle. And if you give me the wrong number and don't get it right away, I

apologize, I should have know the number by heart.

I understand that McGulicutty's Widget Manufacturing is a vast empire that will

make or break our company. Yes, I am lying to you when I say we have no more

cars available. It is not a problem for me to quickly assemble several more

cars. This time I will not forget the purple leather seats.

I work for Enterprise. I am quite capable of checking three contracts in, two

contracts out, taking 5 reservations, answering fifteen incoming calls and

changing the oil in that blue Camry, all at the same time.

I always know where to find the best vegetarian-Kosher-Mongolian barbeque

restaurants. I know exactly what to see and do in this Denver in fifteen

minutes without spending any money. I take personal blame for airline food,

traffic jams, dirty hotel rooms and the National Economy. I understand that

your bad day or your accident, or broken down car are entirely my fault. I

realize that you meant to book your reservation here. People often confuse us

with the "Turkeylurkey Dogsled Rental of the Northern Artic Circle." Of course

I can "fit you in" and yes, you may have the special one dollar rate because you

are affiliated with the Hoboken Accounting and Bagel Club.

I am expected to smile, empathize, sypathize, console, upsell, downsell (and of

course, know when to do which), perform, sing, dance, and fix the printer.

I work for Enterprise.

and you know what......i actually like it, so anyone who has a problem with it, you know where the door is!


top performer

We had something like this floatin around in MS01 when I first started over seven yrs ago....and the shit is still FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!