"DON'T DO IT!!" a true life story of an EX-ERAC employee

[Homesliced]

I remember that cold, drizzly day like it was yesterday...walking into the NEW GP29 office that was just opening that week...it was pouring out, and it was 7:30 on a Monday morning. My hell was about to begin. My phony manager (who would ultimately be terminated for picking up a DWI on his way from an ERAC party) greeted me with a firm handshake and the cheeziest of smiles, just before sending me out into the rain again to clean a filthy car in my new Jos. A Banks suit. AHHH yes...the B.S. in Business Mgmt. was really paying off already!!
The office quickly expanded and in no time we had 100 cars and 5 people in the office. It was a horrible, grinding routine that made the fear and dread of Monday mornings (the time when all the weekend "drops" were back and needed a "quickie" cleaning,) almost unbearable. It was always the same routine...running out of cars, trying to kiss the ass of the dealerships and body shops who needed cars we didn't have, slamming people with "SLP" and eventually Damage Waiver...Of course there was always that pressure to sell SLP at a rate of fuckin 50%!!! WHAT??? 50% of my customers, most of which are victims (claimants) against another persons insurance company, and entitled to a free rental, are supposed to dig into they're own pockets to pay for bullshit "supplemental" insurance they don't even need??? Basically, you were NOT getting promoted unless you sold that crap at that rate...I remember seeing over-zealous trainees spending as long as HALF AN HOUR trying to convince some 85 yr old lady on a fixed income, to buy that crap. Ah yes...Enterprise.....where the customer ALWAYS comes first.
Then there was the ridiculous after hour meetings...remided me of those pep-rallys that they have for Wal-Mart employees...like 55-60 hrs a week was not enough time spent there...FUCK!!
At least the manager was made sure to be "aware" of any upcoming drug tests, and conveniently let you know a couple weeks in advance....LOL. (I am convinced 75% of the people I met thru GP29 were fuckin' pot heads....and why not??? 13 hr. days and unless you got time to suck down a 12 pack, how the hell else are you gonna relax?)
Or how about the little "reward" cards....hahahahah...remember how they were distributed to our "special" shops...but if you knew what to look for you could tell the dollar amout of the reward without scraping the card...basically cash bribes where the $20 ones went to your buddy shops, and the $5 ones to the loser shops. Plus the boxes and boxes of donuts we dumped on them in exchange for referrals. The shit list goes on and on...
Anyway, I could never really convince my self to "Buy the Lie"...we were a bunch of snotty, greedy thieves pretending to give a fuck about our customers but really only convcerned with the "flip" at the end of the month and how soon we could advance. My potsmoking branch manager refused to train me for the "grille"...the hilarious test where you get "grilled" by your district manager to see if you are "fit" for promotion to an "assistant manager" position....where the "real money " is...hahahaha. I , of course failed the first time...it was kinda funny cuz my manager got reamed for refusing to train me...shortly before he got his DWI and left the company.
Let us not forget the FUN side of it thou...beating the shit outta the new cars was truly a riot...i mean...picking up drops on Friday afternoons and taking the long way back to the office....speeding like hell, locking up the brakes (in parking lots of course,...i would never endanger the life of a fellow driver by conducting such maneuvers on a public roadway....LOL), slamming the Ford Festivas (this was the 90's I forgot to mention...) into reverse at 30 mph, burnouts, pushing the rev limiters at idle...hahahah....yea we all did it...and it was fun. But that was about the only fun thing.
during my 5 years there I saw 5 or 6 people at least, in my own office, quit or get fired. Once your there awhile you start to see thru the fascade and you see the company for what it truly is...a machine that chews up and spits out honest, hard working college grads and ultimately only keeps indefinitely, those that are greedy and unscroupulous enuff to survive...usually by making it to "corporate"...where u are generally considered safe. Most ot the area and city managers that I knew that were there, who certainly planned on lifelong careers with enterprise, having made it THAT far, are long gone...once they start making that REAL money that IS possible with ERAC...they are quickly disposed of. And I am talking some of the hardest working people I have ever met...some of them with 200K plus salaries...let go for "not being aggressive enuff when determing who and when to terminate employees...", of for being seen in a place deemed "unsuitable" by ERAC...YES>>>FOR REAL!!! (yea....a nudie bar....big fuckin deal...).

Me...I never made it that far. After becoming ass't manager for my branch I was literally "forced" by my GM to take a job as a "group repair coodinator" because apparently I was the only one in the group who kneww the difference between a fender and a bumper. I was literally told I would be let go if I didnt take the position, and relocate. Ultimately i did, and it was a great move. I was out of "rental" and into ADMIN...much more flexibility, power and most importantly I squeezed them for the maximum starting salary allowed for that position at the time, and almost 20% increase in salary...(I was actually quite legendary around the office for that move, for a brief time anyway....plus the free company car and free gas.). Of course i was only supposed to use it for "work" but truth be told, I took that baby everywhere. Ultimately I would create my own demise at Enterprise. After a fun night out and too many pitchers of brew I decided to go test out my Buddys' new Mitzubishi 3000 GT....boy do those babys fly!! I got busted doing 135 mph in a 65, and bombed of course. The best part is that I knew that I would ultimately be terminated...you have to have a nice shiny record at ERAC and a DWI is grounds for immediate termination. Only thing was.. I decided they would have to find out on they're own. This alllowed me to drive arounfd my company car, as a HUGE liability for ERAC for almost 7 MONTHS befoer they finally ran my MVR and saw my boo- boo. This allowed me total freedom to fuck-off...go in late....blow off all saturdays...(i worked a total of 1 sat at admin). Basically I didnt care, and it was great. Then finally my loss control mgr. called me in to ask me what the fuck happened. I was gone that very day.
So there it is folks, my life at Enterprise. If you ever get the chance to talk to someone in Group 29, ask them about the story of the group president or General manager or whatever the big guy is called...i know he is still there...red headed guy who looks like Howdy Dootie...anyway....rumor has it, and I am told it is tru...that while still a trainee he was repo-ing a car from a cust who was behind on payment, and the customer came out after him while he was trying to start the car, and punched him square in the face knocking him out cold....LOL. God, I would have loved to see that.

Go ahead, JOIN the TEAM!! And do listen to all the hopefuls on here that are STILL employed there who defend this wonderful company...they only do so because they PRAY they will have what it takes to slither up the ladder to the top without being fired for having the wrong color eyes. Good luck!

Originally Posted by Homesliced

I remember that cold, drizzly day like it was yesterday...walking into the NEW GP29 office that was just opening that week...it was pouring out, and it was 7:30 on a Monday morning. My hell was about to begin. My phony manager (who would ultimately be terminated for picking up a DWI on his way from an ERAC party) greeted me with a firm handshake and the cheeziest of smiles, just before sending me out into the rain again to clean a filthy car in my new Jos. A Banks suit. AHHH yes...the B.S. in Business Mgmt. was really paying off already!!
The office quickly expanded and in no time we had 100 cars and 5 people in the office. It was a horrible, grinding routine that made the fear and dread of Monday mornings (the time when all the weekend "drops" were back and needed a "quickie" cleaning,) almost unbearable. It was always the same routine...running out of cars, trying to kiss the ass of the dealerships and body shops who needed cars we didn't have, slamming people with "SLP" and eventually Damage Waiver...Of course there was always that pressure to sell SLP at a rate of fuckin 50%!!! WHAT??? 50% of my customers, most of which are victims (claimants) against another persons insurance company, and entitled to a free rental, are supposed to dig into they're own pockets to pay for bullshit "supplemental" insurance they don't even need??? Basically, you were NOT getting promoted unless you sold that crap at that rate...I remember seeing over-zealous trainees spending as long as HALF AN HOUR trying to convince some 85 yr old lady on a fixed income, to buy that crap. Ah yes...Enterprise.....where the customer ALWAYS comes first.
Then there was the ridiculous after hour meetings...remided me of those pep-rallys that they have for Wal-Mart employees...like 55-60 hrs a week was not enough time spent there...FUCK!!
At least the manager was made sure to be "aware" of any upcoming drug tests, and conveniently let you know a couple weeks in advance....LOL. (I am convinced 75% of the people I met thru GP29 were fuckin' pot heads....and why not??? 13 hr. days and unless you got time to suck down a 12 pack, how the hell else are you gonna relax?)
Or how about the little "reward" cards....hahahahah...remember how they were distributed to our "special" shops...but if you knew what to look for you could tell the dollar amout of the reward without scraping the card...basically cash bribes where the $20 ones went to your buddy shops, and the $5 ones to the loser shops. Plus the boxes and boxes of donuts we dumped on them in exchange for referrals. The shit list goes on and on...
Anyway, I could never really convince my self to "Buy the Lie"...we were a bunch of snotty, greedy thieves pretending to give a fuck about our customers but really only convcerned with the "flip" at the end of the month and how soon we could advance. My potsmoking branch manager refused to train me for the "grille"...the hilarious test where you get "grilled" by your district manager to see if you are "fit" for promotion to an "assistant manager" position....where the "real money " is...hahahaha. I , of course failed the first time...it was kinda funny cuz my manager got reamed for refusing to train me...shortly before he got his DWI and left the company.
Let us not forget the FUN side of it thou...beating the shit outta the new cars was truly a riot...i mean...picking up drops on Friday afternoons and taking the long way back to the office....speeding like hell, locking up the brakes (in parking lots of course,...i would never endanger the life of a fellow driver by conducting such maneuvers on a public roadway....LOL), slamming the Ford Festivas (this was the 90's I forgot to mention...) into reverse at 30 mph, burnouts, pushing the rev limiters at idle...hahahah....yea we all did it...and it was fun. But that was about the only fun thing.
during my 5 years there I saw 5 or 6 people at least, in my own office, quit or get fired. Once your there awhile you start to see thru the fascade and you see the company for what it truly is...a machine that chews up and spits out honest, hard working college grads and ultimately only keeps indefinitely, those that are greedy and unscroupulous enuff to survive...usually by making it to "corporate"...where u are generally considered safe. Most ot the area and city managers that I knew that were there, who certainly planned on lifelong careers with enterprise, having made it THAT far, are long gone...once they start making that REAL money that IS possible with ERAC...they are quickly disposed of. And I am talking some of the hardest working people I have ever met...some of them with 200K plus salaries...let go for "not being aggressive enuff when determing who and when to terminate employees...", of for being seen in a place deemed "unsuitable" by ERAC...YES>>>FOR REAL!!! (yea....a nudie bar....big fuckin deal...).

Me...I never made it that far. After becoming ass't manager for my branch I was literally "forced" by my GM to take a job as a "group repair coodinator" because apparently I was the only one in the group who kneww the difference between a fender and a bumper. I was literally told I would be let go if I didnt take the position, and relocate. Ultimately i did, and it was a great move. I was out of "rental" and into ADMIN...much more flexibility, power and most importantly I squeezed them for the maximum starting salary allowed for that position at the time, and almost 20% increase in salary...(I was actually quite legendary around the office for that move, for a brief time anyway....plus the free company car and free gas.). Of course i was only supposed to use it for "work" but truth be told, I took that baby everywhere. Ultimately I would create my own demise at Enterprise. After a fun night out and too many pitchers of brew I decided to go test out my Buddys' new Mitzubishi 3000 GT....boy do those babys fly!! I got busted doing 135 mph in a 65, and bombed of course. The best part is that I knew that I would ultimately be terminated...you have to have a nice shiny record at ERAC and a DWI is grounds for immediate termination. Only thing was.. I decided they would have to find out on they're own. This alllowed me to drive arounfd my company car, as a HUGE liability for ERAC for almost 7 MONTHS befoer they finally ran my MVR and saw my boo- boo. This allowed me total freedom to fuck-off...go in late....blow off all saturdays...(i worked a total of 1 sat at admin). Basically I didnt care, and it was great. Then finally my loss control mgr. called me in to ask me what the fuck happened. I was gone that very day.
So there it is folks, my life at Enterprise. If you ever get the chance to talk to someone in Group 29, ask them about the story of the group president or General manager or whatever the big guy is called...i know he is still there...red headed guy who looks like Howdy Dootie...anyway....rumor has it, and I am told it is tru...that while still a trainee he was repo-ing a car from a cust who was behind on payment, and the customer came out after him while he was trying to start the car, and punched him square in the face knocking him out cold....LOL. God, I would have loved to see that.

Go ahead, JOIN the TEAM!! And do listen to all the hopefuls on here that are STILL employed there who defend this wonderful company...they only do so because they PRAY they will have what it takes to slither up the ladder to the top without being fired for having the wrong color eyes. Good luck!

I agree 100%! Same thing in GP 52. What a joke for a company. Yeah, it does well, but only because of its slaves (anyone not in corporate). Sad, sad story.

This story should be title, "How to be a fuckup 101". Other than washing a car in the rain where is the bad part about Enterprise?

[Disgruntled ExERACer]

Ford Festiva..hahahahahaha in my day it was the Chevy Metro. Nothing but the best for 9.99 a day!

[Homesliced]

"How to be a fuckup 101"??? HAHAHAHAHAHAH...I dunno there Mr MGMT Trainee...or are you still in the INTERVIEW process after 4 yrs of college and a $400 mo. student loan payment? i OWN my own company now, thanks to Enterprise...I dont WORK for a buNch of thieves who focus on stealing the (pipe) dreams of little wannabes like you. Good luck son, your gonna need it. Yor right, Erac isn't responsible for anything but making me wash cars in my $400 suit...(yes, I am still such a cheap fuck thanks to ERAC that I still think $400 is ALOT for a decent suit....see..now you KNOW i AM FUCKED UP THANKS TO ERAC)

Homeslice . . . you sound like a piece of shit. I don't know who you work for now, but it's a shame they hired a monkey like you. I mean, you must be stupid if you were wearing $400 dollar suits to wash cars. Get a life.

And the part about going 135 miles an hour in a car . . . pure bullshit. if you would've said 100 I'd have believed you. Your whole post reeks of lies. A "legend around the office?" Who writes like that?

[slave no more]

Full of shit. Unless your buddy suped up his car (which I doubt) then the Gov. would have limited the engine and for you to get up to 135 you would have shit yourself before even reaching it. Also, you would not have had a license for them to check. DWI while more than doubling the speed limit (unless you are a diplomat) will almost always guarantee you losing your license so unless you had Johnnie Cochran (you must have left that out) then I doubt your 135 story. Yeah and that 'legend around the office" shit was gay. No one would call you a fucking legend for being a deuche bag.

Hey Homeslice, what type of business do you own? I don't think you're capable of taking a piss without your daddy there to help shake it off.

So the idea of you running a corporation is highly dubious. Next time you come on a message board and lie to a bunch of strangers, please, make your stories some what plausible.

"hahahaha. I , of course failed the first time...it was kinda funny cuz my manager got reamed for refusing to train me"

Homeslice - only fucking losers fail their grill

"Me...I never made it that far. After becoming ass't manager for my branch I was literally "forced" by my GM to take a job as a "group repair coodinator" because apparently I was the only one in the group who kneww the difference between a fender and a bumper. I was literally told I would be let go if I didnt take the position, and relocate. Ultimately i did, and it was a great move."
You were forced into admin because you were a terrible employee.

I worked there for 8 years and became ARM. I agree with 95% of the stuff on this sight and I see ERAC for what it is - A big bad corporation using and spitting people out. But in my 8 years only losers both failed their grill and were forced into Admin... sorry about your luck.