Neat Stunts Before You Leave ERAC

Originally Posted by gp65:(

The unethical part is that ERAC mgmt would never in a million years admit to that. 98% of their job is lying to their employees that they will indeed get promoted if they stay "bought in" and the other 2% is lying to customers about how sorry we are they received shitty service.

The whole business plan is to see how hard young folks will work for a dream which is unrealistic.

The reason they keep telling new hires that there is so much opportunity is because they are trying to hit their own personal recruiting and retention goals and bonuses. If they tell them the truth then they won't hit their goals. It's that simple. Everyone is lookin' out for #1. That is what corporate has created by establishing the current performance based matices in place throughout the company and the constant push to advance quickly. Everything relates back to St. Louis either directly or indirectly.

[ExERAC656]

Originally Posted by blame

Well being the "grid iron" hr person I am, I wrote 237 contracts last month, sold 53%, just to help out. So actually, I am not that far removed from the revenue generating side of the business. If you actually read my posts through your Nyquil induced coma you would understand that the ever so cursed "upper mgmt" any myself the dr reject "hr employee" take this seriously. I hope you choke on your Nyquil, and can't find your insurance card when you go to the doctor.

LOL I have read a lot of funny things on this board, but for an HR person to claim they wrote 237 contracts is a joke. Even recruiters who are in the branches on a daily basis wouldn't even muster a mere 50 rental contracts in a months. You are going to sit here and bold face lie to everyone that you wrote 237 rental contracts in a month...

On average there are 21 working days in a month.. and we know someone from HR isn't working on the weekends... so you ageraved 11 contracts a day??? Bullshit!

You might have sold 53% DW.. Hell I could write 7 contracts and sell on 3 of them and I don't even work there anymore.

And if you did really do this amazing feat of 237 / 53% what do you want us to do applaud you?

Every time a church bell rings, Mr. T pities a fool.

Mr. T doesn't pity anyone who likes the Black Eyed Peas. He just kills them.

Ever have a sharp pain in your chest that you can't explain? That was Mr. T, and it was a warning.

Mr. T speaks only when necessary. His main form of communication is folding his arms and slowly shaking his head. And regardless of the situation, he is always understood.

You can lead Mr. T to water, but chances are that you will die there.

When he found out he would lose the rematch while making Rocky III, Mr. T administered to Sylvester Stallone an angy look. Seeing Mr. T's anger broke every bone in Sly's face, left him mildly retarded and unable to remember the incident. To this day, Sly has no idea why he shits his pants at the mere sight of a black man with a mohawk.

Mr.T once punched Chuck Norris at the exact moment he roundhouse kicked Mr.T in the chest. the result was the 80's.

Mr. T once captured Bigfoot, but released him after he shaved the beast and realized that it was just Chuck Norris walking around naked in the woods.

23. That's the number of people Mr. T has pitied in the time it has taken you to read this sentence.

All that glitters is not gold: If it's not being worn by Mr. T, then it's just jibba jabba, and Mr. T pities the fool who can't tell the difference. This is where the phrase "fool's gold" comes from.

Mr. T invented fools. Realizing the magnitude of his folly, he then created Pity.

Mr. T pities fools because even fools deserves their daily dose of vitamin T.

On the A-team, Face , Haniabal, and Murdoch were all masters of disguise. Mr T didn't have to wear a disguise. The bad guys didn't recognize him out of fear.

If you were born before 1980, there is a good chance that Mr. T is your father. If you were born after, it's guaranteed.

Mr. T coined the phrase, "I see dead people," after the waiting staff at Denny's forgot his birthday.

Mr. T and Chuck Norris once encountered each other on a lonesome British path. Before the inevitable battle could begin, the earth shit itself and created Scotland.

Mr. T is allergic to doorknobs. That's why he can only kick through doors.

Mr. T. does not break wind. He destroys it.

Mr. T once stated that he "doesn't wail on sissy boys." This led to the pink polo shirts with popped collars craze. Little do those pitiful fools know that Mr. T was just making it easier to find sissy boys to wail on.

Mr. T pities the fool who doesn't pity the fool, thus creating a neverending loop of pity and pain.

There are only four horsemen of the apocalypse, because Mr. T is going to walk.

Mr. T's edition of the VH1 show 'Where Are They Now' was the shortest in the show's history. It was 10 seconds long, and consisted of a black screen with the words "Right Behind You" written on it.

When Mr. T received his star on Hollywood's Walk of Fame, he made his hand prints after the cement was dry.

Mr. T once fell into a pool of lava. He nearly drowned.

Like King Midas, everything Mr. T touches turns to gold, even food. Unlike King Midas, Mr. T has learned to ingest gold, like a real man would.

A break in the space-time continuum occurred on July 9th, 1986. Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a guy into Mr. T while he was pitying some fool. Mr. T and Chuck Norris had words (better known as jibba jabba). Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked Mr. T at the exact moment Mr. T punched him in the chest. The result was an alternate universe where Mr. T roundhouse kicks people and Chuck Norris pities fools.

Mr. T's pity for fools is used by mathematicians as a demonstration of the concept of infinity.

Mr. T does not know you personally, but the odds are 7 in 10 that he pities you.

Mr. T is not black. It's just that the sun is to afraid to shine on him.

Mr. T does not have to kick the crap out of you, crap runs out of your ass in fright when you come into contact with Mr. T.

[ExERAC656]

Are You Kidding Me.. My Head Still Hurts From Banging It Against The Wall For Reading Your Post, And Now I Have To Go Do It Again.???

Admin~ Can You Please Block This Jackasses Ip Address.. My Head It Starting To Hurt And Not To Mention The $ It Is Going To Cost Me To Redo The Sheetrock.

The Mr. T and Chuck Norris posts are the funniest posts that I've read in quite a while. Keep em' coming!

[ExERAC656]

Originally Posted by realitycheck

The Mr. T and Chuck Norris posts are the funniest posts that I've read in quite a while. Keep em' coming!

They are amuzing, but good god, I thought we wasted a lot of time bitching about ERAC. That "Sucka" must have a lot of free time on his hands.

[gp65:(]

Originally Posted by realitycheck

The Mr. T and Chuck Norris posts are the funniest posts that I've read in quite a while. Keep em' coming!

Word. Again, I am laughing so hard I might just piss myself.

These are hilarious!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Originally Posted by ExERAC656

Are You Kidding Me.. My Head Still Hurts From Banging It Against The Wall For Reading Your Post, And Now I Have To Go Do It Again.???

Admin~ Can You Please Block This Jackasses Ip Address.. My Head It Starting To Hurt And Not To Mention The $ It Is Going To Cost Me To Redo The Sheetrock.

Lighten up you whining baby. Laugh a little bit, it'll do you some good. My point for adding these posts is because we are all taking this way too seriously. This thread has been beaten to death! I don't think anyone is even talking about the original topic. So, I hope I made a few of you laugh. And in regards to your head, maybe if you hit it into the wall hard enough you'll knock some sense into yourself. Good day.

[ExERAC656]

Originally Posted by Unregistered

Lighten up you whining baby. Laugh a little bit, it'll do you some good. My point for adding these posts is because we are all taking this way too seriously. This thread has been beaten to death! I don't think anyone is even talking about the original topic. So, I hope I made a few of you laugh. And in regards to your head, maybe if you hit it into the wall hard enough you'll knock some sense into yourself. Good day.

HA HA...






okay I laughed..





now shut the f' up!

Originally Posted by ExERAC656

HA HA...






okay I laughed..





now shut the f' up!

You're angry at your father, not at me.